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I masturbated for the first time today in like… 3 weeks? It ..

I masturbated for the first time today in like… 3 weeks? It was 11/10. So fun fact about me- I can only orgasm through oral sex, specifically sitting on a guys face. But, i’m always self conscious of my orgasms because i feel like i don’t look attractive/i’m too rough. So it takes me a LONG time to even feel the confidence and comfort to allow myself to do that with someone. It took me 2 yrs in my last relationship. So what do you guys think? Should i allow myself to orgasm with my current partner? Or have you guys ever felt a woman was “too rough” or she looked or sounded unattractive while she was sitting on your face? 😅

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