This is gonna be a lot of text. Sorry in advance. Hey y’al..

This is gonna be a lot of text. Sorry in advance. Hey y’all. I’m finally feeling mentally well enough to check in and let y’all know I’m still alive. There are multiple reasons I’ve been unwell and unable to be here. The usual underlying depression and anxiety of my life that I’ve suffered from since a in school, but it has recently taken a turn for the worst. If you’re going to tell me I’m “too beautiful to have depression” or something similar, please keep that to yourself. I already feel ashamed. I am also nervous to talk about this but I think it’s important to mention: I had a stalker for about half a year that basically drove me off of all social media. I’ve taken appropriate measures safety wise personally and online, and I believe the situation is over. I am unable to discuss details of the situation due to personal reasons, but I’m okay and seeking out therapy. Cyber stalking and harassment is a huge issue that I don’t think gets enough attention and coverage; some people don’t believe it causes real life harm in the physical world. Anyways, I’m super nervous to post this, to reach back out after I’ve been essentially mia for so long. I’m a one woman show, managing this page and my other social media alone. I might try to hire help for it soon. I honestly can’t thank those of you who have always wholeheartedly supported me and wanted the best for me enough; you are part of the reason I am not just giving up on this completely and deleting all my accounts. I would love to keep modeling and keep posting and keep sharing my life with y’all, but it’s become so difficult and I basically shake and feel like throwing up every time I log on from the anxiety that has been conditioned in me. But I want to keep trying. I honestly and truly understand if you unsubscribe here, and I would never hold that against anyone. I’ve often been bad at responding to private messages in a timely manner due to my social anxiety disorder, and running things by myself makes that worse. I’m honestly not sure if I should even keep this page open, because I’m afraid posting infrequently will lead to people being upset or angry with me. I’m not sure what my next steps will be, but y’all will be the first to know. Thank you for your love and support always. With lots of love, Ellie